Peace is not to found in withdrawal from the World

I heard a version of the above quote on TV and it struck me just how many people use various levels of avoidance strategies to attempt to find some peace in their lives.

Here are some examples:

I'm never going to date again as I've been hurt too many times before.

I'm not going for promotion as it is too political in higher management.

I could never do a customer facing role as I couldn't deal with customer complaints all day.

I'm not friends with that group - they are too bitchy.

I've stopped playing football on Sundays as all the guys really wanted to do was spend hours in the pub afterwards.

All of these avoidance strategies are examples of self destructive behaviour. Withdrawing from friends or families or situations may seem like a permanent solution but in fact it can be the start of a repeating pattern of behaviour that may eventually escalate into a more serious almost phobic response such as agoraphobia or panic attacks.

True peace is to be found in finding ways to be true to oneself but at the same time finding ways to inhabit the world. No one is asking you to be friends with people you don't get on with but having a wide circle of friends and respecting their differences and foibles is healthy. No one is asking you to do a job that you hate but question are there skills you could learn or support you could ask for that would help you.

True peace is to be obtained when, in the words of the famous poem by Rudyard Kipling, 'If you can keep your head when all around are losiing theirs...' or more accurately if you can find yourself and be true to yourself in any situation then you will be at peace with yourself.